Pieces of my Heart
by Princess-Leasel
Summary: My name is Temperance Brennan and today I’m going to die.


Disclaimer: I dont own bones.

**Pieces of my Heart**

My name is Temperance Brennan and today I'm going to die.

My life didn't turn out how I pictured it would but from the age of 15 I learnt that nothing ever turns out the way you plan.

I remember when Angela and Jack first tried to get married, Seeley told me about my father that day and Zach was soon going to be leaving us to fight for his country.

He was the very first of us to die.

We were all so sad the day he left. We told him to keep in touch if he could and he had promised to try. He kept that promise. For the first year we received a letter from him every week. Sometimes they would be pages long, other times the would only be a few sentences. We all looked forward to hearing what he had to say. One week we didn't receive a letter from Zach. Instead we received a government sealed letter telling us we would never see our friend again. He was missing in action, presumed dead. His body was never found.

After Zach I didn't want a new assistant. Cam tried to make me understand that I had to take one on but I refused. She eventually told me the decision was out of our control, the newest member to the team would be here at 10.

It was right after I drove my 6th assistant away that I invited Seeley around for dinner. I wanted the comfort and warmth he brought me just for one night. I wanted to forget about everything else and think only of him and my meal.

We had only just begun to eat when I heard my phone ring. Seeley joked that I should leave it; know full well that I would answer it anyways. As soon as I pick the phone up I wished I had listened to him, but I had learnt long ago that hiding never helps. It was Russ's wife. He had just passed away. His step daughter had fallen off their boat as the weather took a sudden turn. Russ had jumped in trying to save her but the surf was just to ruff. They had both drowned.

That night I cried openly into Seeley's arms. I cried for the time Russ and I had together and for the time we had apart but mostly for the times we would now never share. That night was the start of Seeley and my relationship.

5 years after Angela and Jack first tried to marry Angela fell pregnant. Everyone was so happy for them both. Although they had both given up on getting married, they loved each other beyond words and for them; this child was proof of that love.

Jack was out of town the night Ange went into labor. I was the one to call him and tell him the news. He told me he was leaving immediately and to tell Ange to try and hold the little guy in. Ange's background scream told him there was not much chance of that happening.

Ange was in labor for a long time and every so often I saw her glance towards the door. I knew exactly what she was thinking. I was thinking the same thing. Jack should have been here hours ago. Possibility kept crossing my mind, like he was stuck in a snow storm or his car broke down or he was sitting out in the waiting room along side Seeley. Each time a new one came up I would shoot it down. It's not snowing, he had his car check 3days ago, we made Seeley promise to send Jack in as soon as he arrived. Finally, an exhausted Ange held her new born child in her arms. A beautiful, healthy, baby boy. I rushed straight out to Seeley to tell him the news. I found him alone, slumped in the corner with the coffee table over turned. He looked up and locked eyes with me and I knew why Jack didn't come into the delivery room. He had never made it to the hospital. Within seconds I was in Seeley's arms. I wanted him to tell me everything was ok, that Jack was running late and would be here soon but when he said nothing I said the words that were on both of our minds.

Who was going to tell Ange?

We walked into the room hand in hand, both desperately trying to hide what we knew we couldn't. Ange looked up at us, her face stained with tears. Seeing us enter alone her body was overtaken with sobs. We had decided that when she asked what happened we wouldn't try and sugar coat it, we would tell it to her straight and that's what we did.

He had been rushing to get to the hospital in time for his boys birth. He didn't see the van that ran the red light. It had side swiped him and sent him flying into a tree. Although they had tried, paramedics had failed to keep him alive; he had died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.

After Jacks death Ange didn't cope much. Her son, Mathew, was always at our place. It took a while to adjust to having a baby in the house but we managed. After a while Ange took Mathew home, with us promising her that we were only a call away.

After that the house always seemed lonely, so we threw ourselves into work. Our relationship suffered a little but we always managed to work it through.

It was a few years after Mathew left that I feel pregnant. Booth was over the moon, from the moment I told him, he was planning which room to use as the nursery and where the furniture should be place but most importantly, he couldn't wait to tell Parker he was going to get his long awaited for sibling. I never wanted kids, so I was sure that if I ever found out I was pregnant that I would cry until I could cry no more. I thought I would hate myself for even considering bringing a child into such a cruel world but when I found out I was expecting I did none of this. Instead I smiled. I placed my hand over my stomach and I told my baby that it would be the most loved and most cherished child imaginable. I learnt from Parker and Mathew that it is not a selfish want of a couple to want to bring a child into this world but merely an instinctive.

When we told Seeley's parents, they were a little less than thrilled. Seeley had accepted long ago that I would never marry him. He knew that I truly loved him and in the end, that was more than enough for him. His parent knew I did not have the slightest belief in any religion and thought their was something wrong with my because of my bluntness and inability to 'act like a normal person,' In their eyes I was never good enough for their son. As much as Seeley tried to hide it from me, I knew his parent thought of me as a fling and that soon he would find the woman of his AND their dreams and marry her. I think him declaring I was the mother of his unborn child was a slap in the face to them. It was a sad day and the last time Seeley ever saw his parents.

6months later, much to Seeley and Parker's joy, I gave birth to a little girl.

We named her Sophia Joy Booth.

My father met my daughter only a few times in her life. The last time was the day before her 5th birthday. Sophia didn't have a grandfather figure in her everyday life so she used to love seeing my father. Seeley was worried about the long term effects of taking a young child to a jail. I too was worried but didn't voice it, I knew how much they both needed and wanted the time they got to spend together. On their last visit, Dad told Sophia of a place filled with magic and miracles. She sat their and took in every word he said. She was in total awe of him. He died a week later in his sleep. I didn't cry when I found out. Instead I bought my daughter into my lap and held her close, promising her she would forever remember her grandpop. For a man who lived such a violent life, my father died in the most peaceful way.

At the end of that year Cam left the Jeffersonian and moved back to New York with her husband. She had taken a job at the New York crime lab. We were never close but had promised to keep in touch.

In the months that followed Ange began to fall sick a lot. She was having a stream of never ending colds. Ange being Ange had refused to go to the doctors. She was finally convinced that she needed help when a dizzy spell almost caused her to crash her car while Mathew was in it.

We expected her to have a virus or bad bug but nothing prepared us for what the doctor said. She had bone cancer. Doctor said she would be lucky to see 18months. When she told us I wanted to cry. She looked like she hadn't stopped crying, but she told us to pick a comedy and put it on. There was little laughter during the night but as Ange left I could tell that just having us around was enough to lift her mood a little.

I waited until I was in bed, curled up into the safety of Seeley before I cried. As hard as it was going to be, I was not going to let myself cry in front of Ange. She needed strength and I knew it was my turn to pay her back for everything she has ever done for me.

Ange had everything planned to make sure Mathew would be ok when she passed on. She had made sure that Seeley and I would take Mathew. At first we were shocked but deep down we had known that she would have had it no other way.

We were all so sure Ange would be the next of us to go, but 12 months passed, then the dreaded 18 months and that rolled into 2 years. There were days when she could hardly get out of bed then others where she was the first one up but regardless she always wore a smile.

It was 3 years after Ange had first found out about her cancer that we all went out on a family picnic. It was a beautiful sunny day and Seeley had stolen a few kids and parents and now had a game of soccer going. Ange and I sat under some trees and watched from the shade. Neither of us was looking when we heard the first shots. Instinctively we ducked and moments later the park was showered with bullets. I looked up and saw Seeley protecting Sophia. I thought we had been lucky, I thought we had survived the shots but that was before my eyes locked with the ones of my lifeless lover.

I had yelled and desperately tried to reach him as Sophia clung to my waist screaming. I couldn't watch as he was taken away, my heart could not believe he was gone.

Booth had never talked about his past as a sniper but he always said one day it would catch up with him. I never believed him until I was kneeling in front of his grave; hours after his funeral had ended.

His parents had been there. We didn't speak. I knew they want to and I made it clear I didn't want to speak to them. I could see the way they looked at Sophia, regret filled their eyes. Anyone who ever met her loved her, and I could tell it tore them apart that they had decided before she was even born that they would have nothing to do with her. It was then that I decided they would not know that I was again, pregnant with their son's child.

I never went back to our house. It held to many painful memories. We moved in with Ange as she was beginning to get sicker and I was having a bad pregnancy.

I had my second child 2 months premature. I was so scared I was going to loss my baby. Parker and Sophia were right by my side as we waited for news from the doctor.

Finally, my door opened and I was told my baby was going to be fine. I'd had another little girl. I was wondering what I was going to call her when Sophia piped up. She said she wanted to name the bub Jasmine because daddy had told her that Sophia and Jasmine were his favourite names. Parker and I had no complaints.

It was 4years after Ange had been told about her caner that finally gave up. She hadn't been out of bed in so long. Mathew had started high school the previous week and I was fighting back tears as I watched her struggling to wish him good luck.

It was a Monday morning. Mathew and Sophia were getting ready for school and I was feeding Jasmine. We all heard Ange calling us and made our way into her room. She told the kids to have a good day and that she loved them both immensely. She said the same to me along with a simple thank you for everything. I knew at that moment what she was going to do and I knew I was completely powerless to stop it. I drop the kids at school and cried the whole way home.

When I entered her room I stopped crying. I realized that she was finally free. She no longer had any pain. I closed my eyes and imagined her the way she was when we first met. Opening them I kissed her forehead and called the police.

After that day I packed the kids up and ran. We moved as far away from Washington as we could get. I was ready to start fresh and I knew that for the sake of them, it was what we needed to do. It turned out to the best thing I could have done. All 3 kids grew up well, each exceeding in their chosen career path and each finding happiness with another. Ange and I rubbed of on them a little to much as none of them ever got married. Parker and I remained close. After his mothers death he found no reason to stay in Washington either and moved into a house near by.

10 years ago there was a fire at Parkers house. His wife was away with their eldest daughter at a ballet concert up north. Jasmines youngest 2 children where staying over. Nobody new watch caused the fire but it had engulfed the house in a matter of minutes. I watched alongside Jasmine as the house came crashing down onto of everyone inside.

I didn't think I could handle another loss after that. It was my turn to give up. The universe had thrown to may cruel hurdles at me. I locked my heart away terrified of what would happen if I ever let it out again.

2 years ago I received a call telling me Cam had suffered a stroke. She'd fallen, hit her head hard and died as a result.

It opened the flood gates for me. I cried for everyone I had lost over the years and all the pain we had suffered together.

That's when it hit me; I was the last one alive. I was no longer afraid of death like I was when I was younger. I was and still am not a religious person but I can understand some of what Seeley used to say to me. I no longer believe your life ends when you die but it just starts another journey. I like to think that Seeley would be proud that after all these years I can finally see outside the world we live in and over the horizon.

If you ask the doctors they will tell you a suffered a massive heart attack but if you ask me I will tell you that after years of having tiny cracks shaped into my heart it could no longer take it. After so long my heart finally shattered into a thousand piece.

My name is Temperance Brennan and today I died.


End file.
